I have struggled with my weight ever since I was a little girl. In the 5th grade, I was a size 16. No one ever bullied me about my weight or anything cruel like that. I was lucky enough to have an amazing group of friends and I never once felt like I was being ridiculed.
Nevertheless, my weight was always a problem for me, and my self-esteem. Especially during my Junior High- High school years. I remember dreading P.E class! I would often pray that school rules would change and they would have separate P.E classes. One for boys and one for girls, because I was so insecure about my body and I didn’t want any of the boys to see me run (well…attempt to run) or anything else. Especially, because I had a crush on a boy that was in my P.E class (oh the memories)
The time I really broke down, was when we had to swim for P.E class. I was dreading having to put on a bathing suite. I begged my mom to write me a note to get me out of swimming. I was balling and telling her that I wasn’t comfortable & like any parent, she tried to reassure me that when I get older I would look back on this day and laugh. Of course she was right, but my pre-teen self was having none of it. I would sit in a bathroom stall in the locker rooms and just cry. Half of the time I would get out of swimming by crying wolf & claim that I wasn’t feeling well. The other half I would have to suck it up and join everybody. I would put on ginormous T-shirts to put over my bathing suite and try to hide behind the group of girls to avoid being seen. It was an awful time for me…but that was then.
At 20 years of age, I can honestly say that I am proud of my curves and that I have nothing to be ashamed of. I will admit, I am skinnier than I have ever been in my life. However; I am by no means skinny. I have curves and I wouldn’t have it any other way. I have learned to accept my body & I learned to find what clothes work for me and what does not. I am no longer ashamed to wear a bathing suite in public and I no longer dread going shopping. In fact…I love shopping!
At a young age, we are bread to believe that skinny is beautiful, skinny is healthy. That is not always the case. You have to listen to your body, because everybody is different. Some people have an over active metabolism, like my cousin. She weighs 99 pounds and hates being so skinny. She tries desperately to put on some weight, but that isn’t how her body is built. Everyone has body image issues. Whether you are curvy like me, or skinny like my cousin. Embrace yourself, because you are beautiful.